The Cecilian Society

1 you think a handlebar moustache is an aceptable form of facial hair
2 you have beaten the shit out of rooney on a daily basis
3 you have worried that rooney may have broken his neck
4 andy jones has complained to you that when he was restrained it was hurting in spite of the fact that roney was getting leathered and he was only being held, the big jessie
5 you think no day is complete when it doesnt end in amys death
6you know laura baulds views on ethnic groups
7 you know laura baulds love of pearl necklaces
8 you think that ereasure are motivational gurus
9 you know chester mccrymble
10 you have seen my ass underscored by the prelude
11 you have heard keeny from the block talking about pimipin his hoes
12 you may have been invoved in the soon to be youtube smash i want to break free
13 you have heard dobies masterful grasp of english accents
14 you have heard colin bryces masterful engish accent
15 you have consolled kirsty leith whilst crying
16 you think that a dump is an actual part of the warm up process
17 you wonder if gryson are going to become the next cecilian power couple
18 you know who to call if you want four tabe legs of different lengths
19 you know that adam only does tech so that he can be a scene stealing bastard
20 you have debated the existance of 6/16 as a time signature
21 you have seen ben galloways lesbian hair cut
22 you have seen julies green hair
23 you have wondered if kenny from the blocks collars match his cuffs
24 you think that this is not a game is the new "oh no"
25 you have heard the kayak story
26 you have questioned dalys sexuality
27 you have seen byker grove mapped out near seville
28 you have seen the cock on the mountain flat
29 you have woken up with no voice and a hangover and are glad that you dont have to sing for a whole three days
30 you wonder what kind of cigarettes make smo

31. Thanks to Rob McMillan, you spent half an hour trying to lick certain risque remarks from your fore arms.
32. Rob McMillan looks like a gayer and fatter version of Freddie Mercury/George Michael
33. You've seen Ben Miller break dance
34. You've paid Ben Miller's bus fayre
35. You know Gryson will be the next Cecilian power couple.
36. Colin Mitchell sleeps with his eyes half closed like in 'Only Smoke'
37. Busted's 'Year 3000' is suddenly your favourite on iTunes.
38. You've been groped/sniffed/leered at by Rooney.
39. Emma Fraser spoiled Rooney and Rob's fight by making you listen for the sex noises.
40. You've smuggled condoms, ribbons, cupcakes and a rubix cube.
41. Party Rings are BISCUITS!
42. You've been force fed custard creams/Party Rings at every break time.
43. Charlie Batchelor is the best off satge conductor ever.
44. You've decided that the next aftershow party you will ot sit in the smoking room all night.
45. You know Rob enjoyed Neil Gordon's kiss more than anyone else.
46. Motorboats are 'euthinisms'
47. Lorna Moir is the best stage Manager ever.
48. Its 1,2, 3 FLOOR, 5, 6
49. The girls will not miss hearing certain parts of 'Look At The Crowd'
50. You are NOT racist and you do NOT belong to the BNP.

51. You helped paint the set...but secretly wonder if it wasn't all painted over the moment you got on the plane home.

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52. EVERYONE looks good with a moustache.

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No, really.

53. you know love ressembles a ninja peacock
54. you did what felt like your 50th rookie run
55. you were smuggled by Colin Fyfe
56. you know kenny can throw some serious shapes in a cecilian circle
57. you wore stunt pants
58. you think 'that tiny girl who touches herself' should always have a ginger moustache
59. you know who likes vinegar
60. you dread life without a skirt to swish with every movement
61. desmondo was created and is somehow in your flat along with a paper chain
62. you saw some very fancy abodes
63. you know you will be doing toreador stamps quietly throughout all your lectures tomorrow

64. You keep finding mustaches everywhere in your flat.
65. Syncronized floor hitting is the key to your happiness.
66. You know 12 or so mildly varying, and increasingly confusing, versions of the Habanera specialist dance.
67. You fell asleep to the sound of 'C'est la vie-Bewitched the musical'
68. You've become accustomed to watching Amy rubbing up against an imaginary wall.
69. You've seen Victoria do it like a naughty imp.
70. If you had to choose one posession that you could take to a desert Island it might now actually have to be your Production Team signed, framed Carmen poster. Because you are that gay.
71. You miss the power already.
72. You have been wearing a T-shirt that says 'Way' for around 29 hours and have no plans to take it off in the near future.
73. You really and truly ended up loving many of those translated English lyrics.
74. I tiny, wrong part of you wishes that just once in the guardhouse scene Amy had leaned back on the wrong section of the flats and diasappeared from sight to be replaced by a section of mountain pass.

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One by one the penguins steal my sanity.

75. You got locked out of your flat and weren't actually bothered as it meant you had to spend more time with cecilians.
76. You have a new found love for stunt pants.
77. You have a new found love for fake tan.
78. You are slightly saddened that it is no longer appropriate to black up every day.
79. You truely believe that techy adam should grow a moustache.
80. You know how many syllables are in Ben Galloway.

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81. You know how to accidentally eat a bacon cheeseburger
82. You prayed every night that the band would get David's exit music right (Act One)
83. You prayed every night that David would get David's exit music right (Act Two)
84. Several people apologised for perving over your girlfriend
85. Several people's fathers perved over your girlfriend.
86. You're still concerned your own father might have been one of them.
87. You wished someone would smuggle a budgie.
88. You were sad that the aftershow did not involve a complete rendition of "Big Gay John: the Musical".
89. You have taken to using "Sweet Jesus-the-Lizard" as an expletive.
90. You know why Jennifer Halliday is a wanted woman.
91. You almost asked Toast to play The Enticement on Laura Bauld's party-ring-castanets.
92. You debated the physical possibilities of rolling a cigarette with your naked thighs.
93. You watched someone ignore an elephant with a flourish.
94. The Mitchell cafe staff start pouring your take away latte before you've even ordered it.
95. You got a diary reminder for sexual deviency, but couldn't action it because the remaining participants were all fast asleep.
96. You're worried that Emma Fraser secretly is Kathryn Hyde and began to start wondering whether you ever actually saw them on stage at the same time.
97. You go back to work and wonder why everyone suddenly looks so pale.
98. You know that a peacock special does not involve ninjas or Victoria Bianchi.
99. You have an uncontrollable urge to inform anyone who'll listen that "These mountains are dangerous".
100. You instigated a game of "teeth" with the sole purpose of making Coen's mouth bleed.

101. You want to bawl your eyes out because a) it's all over and b) your day doesn't start with Gregor blacking you up
102. A £2 ring from New Look has acquired deep significance in your life
103. You’ve “scuttled through with the swag”
104. You didn’t mind that Rooney felt you up on stage, you just wish he’d asked nicely
105. You’ve threatened Dave with castration if he forgets the Toreodor Reprise
106. You brought Dave back onstage when he forgot the Toreodor Reprise using sheer willpower
107. You will only be kissing one man per night from now one. Probably.
108. You can’t bring yourself to throw the hair extensions away, even though they’re matted with fake blood
109. You wore sensible pants, but not a lot else
110. You’ve washed and ironed your Finale costume every day for a week
111. You’ve argued at length over what turning over your right shoulder actually means
112. You are covered in bruises but you don’t mind because they remind you of how wonderful it all was
113. Your top fell off the night Gregor’s parents were in the front row
114. You’ve simulated penetration through the medium of a top B
115. Whilst leaning against a wall in a meeting at work you resist the temptation to slide down it provocatively
116. Gregor’s mum definitely thought you were slutty enough
117. So did Laura McMeekin’s dad
118. And Andy Jones’ dad
119. The Finale is actually the best experience you’ve ever had EVER
120. Andy wants you to aim it so more of it goes on your chest *snigger*
121. You slept through the police coming to the door at the aftershow
122. You slept through Defying Gravity at the Tech Party
123. You wish you’d slept through I Want to Break Free at the Tech Party
124. You’ve been subjected to Lisa and Alison’s rendition of Bewitched – the Musical
125. You still think Rob should have had an eye patch
126. Fieldhouse has coached you in the art of erotic dance
127. Gregor gave you a note that said the dance was all very well but the singing wasn’t erotic enough
128. Several of Andy’s friends/admirers want to kill you for being such a bitch
129. You think Sophie Malleson is a goddess for taking such amazing photos
130. You love the Tesco Finest Production Team more than life itself

131. Kathryn Hyde stroked your cheekbones for a little bit too long...and you liked it.
132. You're going to miss Maz calling you 'girl' on stressful sundays because it makes you feel street.
133. You're gonna keep coming up with 'you know you were in's because it is all you have left.
134. You have been wearing a 'Way' t-shirt for around 39 hours.

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One by one the penguins steal my sanity.